Get more results by doing less.

What if I told you about a way to get better results, and it involves doing less? In fact, it involves doing nothing--------at least for a while. This, in so many words, is the art of not forcing: it comes down to giving things more time to get insights, ideas, inspiration and clarity------and to make the right decision when you find yourself in the middle of a crossroad.

It is tied to this expression that you must know as well: time will tell. It’s another one of my favorites. We all know this from experience: initially things look one way, but then over time it looks like something totally different. And it applies as wide as the art of not forcing: a person whom you just met, a job opportunity, a career path, a place to live and even more everyday things like clothes, books, series, movies and computer games.

I wish I had known about the art of not forcing when I was younger, because there are so many examples from my past where I have thought back and was like: if only I gave it some more time. It will not only help you to not make the wrong the decision, but it also ties in to something that’s very practical: it will keep you from wasting time and money on things that are not important. 

That’s why I would suggest that giving things time is an essential part of the art of not forcing. And it gets even better than that. Have you ever had this feeling for a longer period of time where you were like: if I only met someone. And then as soon as you let go of that feeling, when you started focusing more on yourself and having a good time--------that’s when you finally meet someone really interesting. 

That’s also the art of not forcing. Because if you try too hard, then you become an artificial version of yourself. And this is just something that people pick up on. They might not be able to say what exactly doesn’t seem right, but the most that they will be able to say is something like “something seems off”, or “this ain’t real”, or the blunt one “this ain’t natural”. 

The art of not forcing doesn’t mean that you should stop trying to get better every day. It means that you try to find that delicate balance where you try to get better each and every day, but where you don’t try so hard that you stretch yourself out too thin. It’s like this French cheese where you need to have a good thick layer in order to experience the full flavor. And meeting someone in a romantic way is just a small part of all this. 

You will meet more interesting people in general, you will come across opportunities and life will become way richer because of that. And when you have mastered the art of not forcing, you need to lean in on the ability to recognize opportunities when they come along. 

Where it comes to opportunities, I always keep this in the back of my mind: they will come by, there will be a few people who talk about it and there’s a short window where you can act on it. I’m not necessarily referring to the people close around you, but in order to recognize the really big opportunities you will need to go online. Follow different folks. Figure out who is real from who is not. And you will need to keep in the back of your mind that most people have not mastered the art of not forcing, so those people will not have millions of views, but it will be in the tens, the hundreds or a few thousand. And you might be one of those people, because you have it in your hands whether you will master the art of not forcing.
I wish I had known about the art of not forcing when I was younger, because there are so many examples from my past where I have thought back and was like: if only I gave it some more time. It will not only help you to not make the wrong the decision, but it also ties in to something that’s very practical: it will keep you from wasting time and money on things that are not important. That’s why I would suggest that giving things time is an essential part of the art of not forcing. And it gets even better than that. Have you ever had this feeling for a longer period of time where you were like: if I only met someone. And then as soon as you let go of that feeling, when you started focusing more on yourself and having a good time--------that’s when you finally meet someone really interesting. That’s also the art of not forcing. Because if you try too hard, then you become an artificial version of yourself. And this is just something that people pick up on. They might not be able to say what exactly doesn’t seem right, but the most that they will be able to say is something like “something seems off”, or “this ain’t real”, or the blunt one “this ain’t natural”. The art of not forcing doesn’t mean that you should stop trying to get better every day. It means that you try to find that delicate balance where you try to get better each and every day, but where you don’t try so hard that you stretch yourself out too thin. It’s like this French cheese where you need to have a good thick layer in order to experience the full flavor. And meeting someone in a romantic way is just a small part of all this. You will meet more interesting people in general, you will come across opportunities and life will become way richer because of that. And when you have mastered the art of not forcing, you need to lean in on the ability to recognize opportunities when they come along.  

Where it comes to opportunities, I always keep this in the back of my mind: they will come by, there will be a few people who talk about it and there’s a short window where you can act on it. 

I’m not necessarily referring to the people close around you, but in order to recognize the really big opportunities you will need to go online. Follow different folks. Figure out who is real from who is not. And you will need to keep in the back of your mind that most people have not mastered the art of not forcing, so those people will not have millions of views, but it will be in the tens, the hundreds or a few thousand. And you might be one of those people, because you have it in your hands whether you will master the art of not forcing.